I refuse to give up on beauty. You know what I mean? Maybe it's enough to just know it's out there somewhere. I've seen it before. I've seen proof. I don't mean the physical kind. Well, I suppose it can be material. Even aesthetic. But I'm thinking more of the spiritual kind of beauty. People at school keep telling me I'm bubbly. That's okay. It's the closest word they can think of to describe it I guess. Same for me I suppose. It's just funny because I keep thinking "if only these guys had known me when..." Then again, maybe I've always been like this, and I just wasn't paying attention before. I was tuned in to a different dimension then. That's for sure. But I keep coming back to this one... Something very liberating has happened to me with this blog. It keeps coming to me in little increments. I find myself reaching cressendos of honesty that seem impossible in the "real world". It is a "journal" after all, and that defence seems to be enough for my inner dialogue to rationalize it. For now anyway.